So after a very dramatic and obstacle-infested this half of the year had been, I want to say that I SURVIVED yet another chance in making myself change for the better. I’ve improved what needs to be improved, and so far, I’m making up for the wrong decisions that I’ve made in the past.
God had been with me all along. Maybe I had to go through traumatic experiences to love myself more and make myself grow. Before, I’ve been a weak person; I cry even in the slightest stumble (this is a figure of speech) but now, I learned how to be independent. And as of now, I’m still sacrificing. I sacrifice my time because of my younger brother, I sacrificed socializing because I don’t intend to be with people who parties hard, because to be honest, I’m not that kind of girl, and I don’t want to be a social climber who tries to fit in just to say that I have “friends”.
I’m still here pursuing my dreams. There will always be things that would bring you down. But the key to that is just hold on. I’ve learned so much, from the little pink slip (this is a reference to a past blog post here) to the new environment that I am in.
I miss the old me. The old me who was in that dream that not only I had hoped and prayed hard for. I miss everything about it. But I valued something deeper up to the point that I was willing to give up everything just to make things okay for another. I cried and I still hurt because I want it all; but it makes me strong. One day, I would live that dream in the future, with better opportunities and moments, and no one would ever feel sorry ever again.
But I like the me now. I struggle not for greatness, but for learning further. And I would always thank the Lord for being there when no one else was. Without him, I wouldn’t be able to have another chance at living. I will make up for everything that I destroyed, and for everyone whom I hurt the most.
In behalf of the little pink slip,
and my uncanny cause for trouble, this has been the most despicable girl that you would probably come across with;
towards a better, more sophisticated and mannered woman in me.
Thank you God. Thanks everyone. Babawi ako. 🙂